[Intro – Spoken Over Guitar] Now, I've heard there's a fella Down around these parts… Goes by a few different names. Some call him Daniel. Some call him Sawyer. Some call him Operator Man. But if you're anywhere near Tick Mountain… You better call him DAN! [Guitar kicks in] [Verse 1] Daniel, Daniel Sawyer, Georgia's where it all began, Nineteen ninety-three, first day of spring, Back of a pickup truck— That's how he entered the land! Highway Ninety-Five outside Savannah, Before he could walk, he was probably lookin' for a hammer. Born with a wrench and a country-song soul, And somewhere along the way, That boy lost control. North Fork River, Dawt Mill to Tecumseh, Jason in the boat, sayin', "Dan, where we goin'?" Dan says, "Hell, I don't know— Just start paddlin'!" [Pre-Chorus] Mammaw White made cathead biscuits, Pappaw White taught him how to whittle, Front porch swing, evening sky, Learned how to work before he learned to fly. Auntie Edna had dog pens to clean, And Dan was the hardest workin' kid you'd ever seen. [Chorus] WHO RUNS DICKHEAD MOUNTAIN? DAN! WHO'S THE TICK BOY? DAN! WHO'S THE OPERATOR? DAN! WHO'S GOT A CHEVY FULL OF BAD IDEAS? DAN! He's been down to Liner, He's been up to Tick, He'll take that one-ton flatbed And make it do a trick. He's Dan the Man, And everybody knows— When Dan starts drivin'… YOU BETTER HOLD ON! [Verse 2] Kitten and Emmy, Isabella ridin' through the fields, Young enough to think they'd never need wheels. Horseback ridin', summertime sun, Back when gettin' muddy Was the whole damn fun. Then Al and Shell say, "Meet us at the lake," Bull Shoals water— A boat and a wake. Dan never needed much to have a good time, Just a little bit of water And somebody sayin', "Hold my line." [Verse 3] Two thousand four, Chico Lake, Linda had an air mattress and a floatin' mistake. Dan had a one-horse motorboat, And he knew just what to do— "Hop on, Linda! I'll pull you!" Round and round that lake they went, Dan grinnin' like he owned the government. He'd sit in the truck with a pop in his hand, Country music playin'— Just a good ol' man. Then Bob would say, "Dan, we got somewhere to go." Dan said, "Where?" "BIG FIREWORKS!" Dan said, "LET'S ROLL!" [Chorus] WHO RUNS DICKHEAD MOUNTAIN? DAN! WHO'S THE TICK BOY? DAN! WHO'S THE OPERATOR? DAN! WHO'LL DRIVE THAT TRUCK WHERE NO TRUCK OUGHTA GO? DAN! Prestonia Road, one-ton flatbed, Linda said, "Shift!" Dan said, "I got it!" Put that thing in gear, And down the road he went— LIKE HE'D BEEN BORN IN A TRUCK! Oh wait… HE WAS! [Breakdown] [Drums stop – crowd claps] Now let's talk about Dickhead Mountain… You ever seen Dan cruisin' up there? NO? Well, you better stand back. Because when that Chevy comes around that bend… There's gonna be dust. There's gonna be gravel. There's probably gonna be somebody yellin'… "DAN, SLOW DOWN!" And Dan's gonna say… "WHAT?" [Verse 4 – The Crab Song] Now Dan's got another special talent, And everybody knows it's true… Give that man some sand And tell him there's crabs in view. Sand in his crack, Sand between his toes, Sand everywhere a man Really doesn't want sand to go. But he don't care— He's on a mission. He'll crawl through that beach Like a redneck fisherman. He comes back grinnin', Bucket in his hand— "Look what I got!" CRABS! "Dan, where'd you get 'em?" "THE GROUND!" [Bridge] Now life got a little more serious, But it didn't slow him down. Josie and Wiley came along, And changed that boy around. Now he's got two youngins Keepin' him on his toes, And every day he's bringin' home That bacon for those two. Still workin' hard, Still havin' fun, Still chasin' down the next adventure Before the last one's done. That's the Sawyer way. [Final Chorus – Big] WHO RUNS DICKHEAD MOUNTAIN? DAN! WHO'S THE TICK BOY? DAN! WHO'S THE OPERATOR? DAN! WHO'S THE KING OF EVERY BACKROAD IN THIS LAND? DAN! From Georgia to the Ozarks, From the river to the sand, From cathead biscuits To a one-ton flatbed— THAT'S DAN THE MAN! He's got a front-porch heart, A blue-collar hand, A Chevy full of stories And a family that knows— AIN'T NOBODY LIKE DAN! [Outro – Call & Response] Daniel! DAN! Sawyer! DAN! Tick Boy! DAN! Operator Man! DAN! King of Dickhead Mountain! DAN! What a peculiar guy! DAN! Who's bringin' home the bacon? DAN! Who's catchin' all the crabs? DAN! Who's drivin' that Chevy? DAN! WHO RUNS DICKHEAD MOUNTAIN?! DAN THE MAN! [Guitar riff — crowd yelling — fade out]